How to Avoid a Wedding Hairdon’t

It’s a finishing touch, so it may be the last thing you think about, but a wedding hairdo can be a major source of freakout. No need to stress – just a little preplanning can give you a cool head and even cooler tresses.

If you really like your usual hairstylist’s work, ask.

If he or she feels comfortable doing your hair for the wedding, cool. Your stylist knows you and your taste, and has doubtless heard about the planning already, so this could be an easy fit. But don’t be shy about asking what he or she would do first. If you’re on completely different pages, see how open your hairdresser is to taking your input. If you feel like you don’t see eye to eye, it may be time to gently bring up, say, going to a specialist in updos as a face-saving way to see someone else.

If your stylist isn’t comfortable doing wedding hair, ask for a recommendation. Again, as someone who knows you, he or she can probably think of someone you’ll click with. That said…

Don’t be afraid to shop around.

You’re a nice person, but you’re also a savvy consumer. It’s OK to talk to several stylists, look at their books, and even to go with one that wasn’t recommended by your mom, sister, or BFF. It’s your hair, so it’s your own eye and gut that you should be trusting. And yes, it’s OK to ask that stranger with the fabulous hairdo where she got it.

Find a hairdresser you like.

Nope, not just the ‘dos, though obviously liking your hairstylist’s style is key. But being bullied by the best stylist in the world is unlikely to result in a hairstyle you love. Find one you click with as a person. Feeling comfortable talking about what you do and don’t want is just as important as your stylist’s mad skills. You should also find a hairdresser whose judgment you trust – a stylist who’s been bullied by you isn’t going to make any magic.

The big day is not enough.

Plan on at least two visits to the salon before your wedding day. If you are wearing a veil or any other kind of headpiece, bring them. If your stylist insists that you can do it all on the last day with no visits beforehand – especially if he or she hasn’t seen you at all – kick off your heels and sprint away. Unless you have a crew cut that just needs a little touching up with the razor, this will only end in tears.

Think twice about bringing your bridesmaids.

You know how not all dresses look good on all people? That goes double for hairdos. Going in together can be fun, but I strongly recommend avoiding the temptation to get all matchy with everyone.

If you do all go in together, give the salon a firm head count early on. Never assume that a salon can squeeze in just one more at the last minute. They’ll base their timing for hair (and makeup, if the stylists are doing that too) on numbers, so an extra person means everyone gets shorted.

Think thrice about bringing your mom.

I know: Your mom is probably terrific, and she may even be excited at the prospect of you getting glammed up together. But wedding stress plus new hairdo anxiety plus the presence of a parent can turn you thirteen years old in no time. Unless she’s your rock in these situations, primp separately. You’ve already got two opinions in the mix. You don’t need extra tangles in the plan today.

And nothing sends terror through a salon like the sight of the mother of the bride coming in. As fantastic as your mom may be, they’ve encountered way too many who were not. If you need to be sneaky, mention how great your mom’s hair looks as much as possible over the next few months to help steer her toward her own usual stylist.

Wear a shirt that you don’t have to pull over your head.

Yeah, I know. That one’s obvious. Unless you’re rushing around on the big day and you forget. OK, unless I’m rushing around on the big day and I forget. If you’d rather not sit in the middle of a salon wearing just a bra and one of those bibs they use to keep hair from getting on you while your maid of honor frantically calls around trying to find a friend who can bring you a button-down, take a moment to breathe and make sure you’re wearing a shirt you don’t have to pull over your head.

Practice your gracious smile.

You know: for when everyone tells you how beautiful you look. Have a great day!

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